Not in my town

Call me naive. Call me sheltered. But, who would have thought that homelessness existed in my town? That's right folks; here in St. Joe, Mo., population near 74,000 there is a homeless epidemic. I guess I am naive. Growing up in rural America, the only time I saw homeless people was when I went to the National Western Stock Show in Denver, and I never really associated St. Joe with the "big city" as it is so spread out and friendly. However tonight, I was exposed to another side of town.

For the past few months I have been on a personal cleaning spree that started with packing to move to my new digs last fall. I am not one to have patience with having a yard sale although wouldn't Grandma Raymer LOVE that if I did! Nor do I feel I have the time. But I do think I have some pretty good "stuff". So my friend at work, Sara, told me about the Grace House, a place downtown that was looking for donated items for St. Joe's needy. At the time, needy didn't equal homeless in my little brain.

I have taken several car loads of clothes, blankets, sheets, towels, dishes, purses, shoes, pots and pans down to the Grace House on Saturdays that I'm home, and have always left in awe with the number of folks in there picking out items. Tonight, with assistance (muscles and use of pickup), Don Laughlin and I took my loveseat and living room chairs to the Grace House, in anticipation of my very first "new" furniture that I purchased that will be delivered next week. The coordinator recognized me, asked me what church I attended, and said, "God Bless You!" with a smile, as she had just given away her last two sofas, and had other families in need. Then, I told her I had more clothes and shoes at home, and that is when Don's interest was sparked. He asked if she accepted men's clothing. Then, she started talking about the homeless, and how they needed "sturdy men's jeans" and "men's shoes or boots with good soles" because summer was coming and the homeless would be walking and sleeping near the river (Missouri) to stay cool. WHAT? That is when I acted calm and cool, and not so naive. I know I wrote about the homeless in Denver in January, but we're talking about the town I live in! I know life can be bad; I've seen some tough St. Joe neighborhoods in my other volunteering, but to sleep on the streets?!? I sure hope any of you readers know if your life ever gets that bad, you can always come stay with me!

So, now I have a new passion. Next Tuesday, and the Tuesdays and Saturdays I'm not traveling for the Association or for my own enjoyment, you might find me at 5th and Edmond. You might just find me at the Grace House. I have to apply to be a volunteer first. (I hope they accept me!) But, I really feel this is a great step to my calling that I've been searching for--helping others.

Next time you think, "not in my town" or "not in my lifetime" take a look around. You'll be suprised to what you might find. I was.

Do YOU Believe in Angels?

I never really believed in angels until May 27, 2009, when on the eve of my 36th year I was introduced to Melanie Yang, who became my 8-year-old angel, that I wasn't aware I needed. You see May 27 was the night I was "matched" with Melanie, my "little" through the Big Brothers/Big Sisters program in Saint Joseph. And, though as the "big sister" volunteer I was supposed to help this youngster from a single-parent home, she opened my eyes and helped me grow more than anyone or anything really ever could.

You see, I am a self-proclaimed workaholic. For years, during my annual review, I have been criticized for putting in too many hours (I never knew that was a bad thing, but I blame my parents for my work ethic). But, then, late last spring, I met Melanie, and my life changed. Through BB/BS I was required to spend 2-4 hours per week with my little, and since I travel most weekends in the summer, that meant leaving the office at 4:30 (closing time) to pick her up and spend time with her before her mom's curfew of 8 p.m.

Our first night, we went over the ground rules, and then only had about 45 minutes, so we made our first trip to Baskin Robbins, a place she'd never been before. By summer's end, I made sure Melanie had ice cream whenever her heart desired! Throughout our weekly visits, we'd play mini-golf, talk walks along the River Walk, make crafts, bake cookies, go shopping, visit PetCo to watch the animals, play board games (Yahtzee, Monopoly and Life), eat out--I took her to her one and only trip to Olive Garden, but she was just as happy at McDonalds.

We participated in BB/BS match activities like a swimming party and movie night. As we gathered with other "matches" it amazed me how well the program paired the bigs and littles. Even though I grew to love Mel's little sister Tiffany, she was much more a girly-girl, and giggly and outgoing, where Mel was more like me--laid back, loved the outdoors, loved to bake cookies and was a little competitive. And, Tiff's big sister Pam was very well suited for her.

Tonight, was the night I knew was coming, but hadn't really prepared for. Melanie told me in early December that they would be moving to Minnesota to live with her grandparents, and that she didn't want leave her friends or me. I've talked to her each week about the move, and the art of being a pen-pal. I should know--my parents and I moved about every 4 years during my growing up years, and I still write and Facebook at least one friend from each of my schools. I have tried to be the adult--until tonight. When I picked Melanie up tonight she and Tiff showered me at their apartment door with gifts--a plush little teddy bear named Dena, a gift certificate to the mall, and a necklace that says #1 sister. That's when the tears started rolling. You see, I've never been a sister before--I've been a daughter, granddaughter, niece, and Aunt Shelia, but never really a sister. And, I knew right then, what started out as a very happy morning for me was going to end as a very sad night.



After we baked cookies and ate cookies and drank milk at my house, we took a few final pictures and headed back to Melanie's apartment. The tears streamed down my face the entire way, but I tried to keep the conversation light. I asked her what her favorite parts of our experience had been, and she replied, baking cookies, going to the River Walk and the first night we met. And, I have to agree. When we got to her apartment, Tiff insisted on a "group hug" one of my favorite weekly activities, and I thanked their mom for the nice gifts, now wearing the necklace. Her mom thanked me for all I had done for them. But she'll never know what that 8-year-old angel brought to my life--a new perspective.

If the littles get as much out of BB/BS as this "big" did in 8 short months, it has got to be one of the best organizations ever!